You help me with my emptyness.
You help me fight my darkness.
Friday, February 27, 2009
shalom
Something you cant find.
Somthing you cant make.
Somthing you can shape and change.
Somthing that changes almost every minute.
Lost in the falts of myself.
Lost in the world.
Lost in the vast sea of me.
Lost yet found?
So confused yet every thing is clear.
So silent yet explosive.
So peacefull yet violent.
So me but not me.
The me that confuses myself.
The list that never ends.
The falts of a great person.
People only remember 3 things.
What you did wrong.
What you did right.
Death.
Shalom
Somthing you cant make.
Somthing you can shape and change.
Somthing that changes almost every minute.
Lost in the falts of myself.
Lost in the world.
Lost in the vast sea of me.
Lost yet found?
So confused yet every thing is clear.
So silent yet explosive.
So peacefull yet violent.
So me but not me.
The me that confuses myself.
The list that never ends.
The falts of a great person.
People only remember 3 things.
What you did wrong.
What you did right.
Death.
Shalom
Monday, February 23, 2009
Thursday, February 19, 2009
maby
its just hard for me to let people in.
Its that i try not to its just that i dont know how beacuse im so used to it just being me.
me alone.
but its not just me anymore
so ill try to let you in more.
Its that i try not to its just that i dont know how beacuse im so used to it just being me.
me alone.
but its not just me anymore
so ill try to let you in more.
Testament Of A Solider
While yall talk shit
Im too busy to listen
I don't crack under pressure
I deal with the friction
Here its more than opinions
And though entitled to em
I don't think yall
Understand what yall doin
Or what yall sayin
Yall got to be kiddin me
What did yall think it cost
To be livin free
So for our country
We will bleed
While you run your mouth
You say in defense of me
But mofucker please
You've made your millions
You could never
Feel me
And while yall talk shit
Understand how that's possible
We made you rich
Cause we are willing to die for you
But yall take that for granted
So heres a one way ticket
Anywhere on this planet
I will not have you talk shit
While I die for your family
Protectin our interests
But you don't understand em
Built on murder
Our country's exapanded
And so far our troubles
Have rewarded you handsome
But now you critisize
The hand that fed you
And though you try to forget
No, I wont let you
And you coulda always of left
So now im here in iraq
Wondering whats kept you
Thinking we'd all be better of here
Less you
Opening your mouth
Against the country that's blessed you
And we shouldn't be here
Says youBut we are
And you still continue
To sit
While we swap spit with these fuckers
No you don't have to agree
But you could at least support us
Stand behind us
If not for us
But your too busy
Runnin your mouth for reporters
While we here
Sweatin it out the entire fourth quarter
And you wont fight
So we fight for you
And freedom has a price
We payin it for you
The game of your life
We're playin it for you
While you shit on everything
This country's done for you
Keep runnin your mouth
Hope the world ignores you
No you don't speak on our behalf
We speak for you
And it's a shame
You even think you can speak for me
No I don't see you in the streets
Bleedin for me
And until you've walked it
You cant talk it for me
We bought your careers
Fuck have you bought me
We pay the bills for those
Opinions you offering
And we do more than kill in your name
We slaughter them
So everyday you can hug
Your son and daughter again
But how easily
You forget what we've done
And how easily
When we stand you run
Fuck is really goin on
And please when you talk war
Hold your tongue
Cause for you to have lived this long
We have died so young
Look at yourself in the mirror
What have you become
Other than spoiled
By all the sacrifices we made
Enjoying life huh
After the ones we gave
Where would you be without war
Yall are so nieve
Only fuckers in the world
Complaining yall free.
Testament Of A Solider
4th25
Im too busy to listen
I don't crack under pressure
I deal with the friction
Here its more than opinions
And though entitled to em
I don't think yall
Understand what yall doin
Or what yall sayin
Yall got to be kiddin me
What did yall think it cost
To be livin free
So for our country
We will bleed
While you run your mouth
You say in defense of me
But mofucker please
You've made your millions
You could never
Feel me
And while yall talk shit
Understand how that's possible
We made you rich
Cause we are willing to die for you
But yall take that for granted
So heres a one way ticket
Anywhere on this planet
I will not have you talk shit
While I die for your family
Protectin our interests
But you don't understand em
Built on murder
Our country's exapanded
And so far our troubles
Have rewarded you handsome
But now you critisize
The hand that fed you
And though you try to forget
No, I wont let you
And you coulda always of left
So now im here in iraq
Wondering whats kept you
Thinking we'd all be better of here
Less you
Opening your mouth
Against the country that's blessed you
And we shouldn't be here
Says youBut we are
And you still continue
To sit
While we swap spit with these fuckers
No you don't have to agree
But you could at least support us
Stand behind us
If not for us
But your too busy
Runnin your mouth for reporters
While we here
Sweatin it out the entire fourth quarter
And you wont fight
So we fight for you
And freedom has a price
We payin it for you
The game of your life
We're playin it for you
While you shit on everything
This country's done for you
Keep runnin your mouth
Hope the world ignores you
No you don't speak on our behalf
We speak for you
And it's a shame
You even think you can speak for me
No I don't see you in the streets
Bleedin for me
And until you've walked it
You cant talk it for me
We bought your careers
Fuck have you bought me
We pay the bills for those
Opinions you offering
And we do more than kill in your name
We slaughter them
So everyday you can hug
Your son and daughter again
But how easily
You forget what we've done
And how easily
When we stand you run
Fuck is really goin on
And please when you talk war
Hold your tongue
Cause for you to have lived this long
We have died so young
Look at yourself in the mirror
What have you become
Other than spoiled
By all the sacrifices we made
Enjoying life huh
After the ones we gave
Where would you be without war
Yall are so nieve
Only fuckers in the world
Complaining yall free.
Testament Of A Solider
4th25
Monday, February 16, 2009
we all
We all fight.
We all wonder.
We all try.
We all fight our battles.
We all fight our demons.
We all feal alone at some point.
We all know somthing.
We all say things we souldnt.
We all find silence.
We all die.
We all walk our paths.
We all bleed red.
We all ask ourselves who we are.
We all.
We all wonder.
We all try.
We all fight our battles.
We all fight our demons.
We all feal alone at some point.
We all know somthing.
We all say things we souldnt.
We all find silence.
We all die.
We all walk our paths.
We all bleed red.
We all ask ourselves who we are.
We all.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
just fine and lie low
the magic numbers.....
3 *
5
7 *
11
18...dont ask never tell *
23 *
24
25*
26
27
28
31
34
35 *
36
38
45 *
46
47
48 *
49
55
57
65*
dont hunt to hard
never surch
just find
*what plays in my head
3 *
5
7 *
11
18...dont ask never tell *
23 *
24
25*
26
27
28
31
34
35 *
36
38
45 *
46
47
48 *
49
55
57
65*
dont hunt to hard
never surch
just find
*what plays in my head
Saturday, February 14, 2009
lies and illusions
sometimes i wonder why I'm the way I'm.
sometimes i wonder who i will be.
sometimes i wonder what if the darkness won.
sometimes i wonder who will remember me.
sometimes i wonder what if i where different.
Never look back.
Never wonder.
Never regret anything.
You only have one life to live on this earth.
Only one life to serve.
Only one.
One.
Unity
One thing we wish for.
Yet while we scream peace over the bombs falling.
sometimes i wonder who i will be.
sometimes i wonder what if the darkness won.
sometimes i wonder who will remember me.
sometimes i wonder what if i where different.
Never look back.
Never wonder.
Never regret anything.
You only have one life to live on this earth.
Only one life to serve.
Only one.
One.
Unity
One thing we wish for.
Yet while we scream peace over the bombs falling.
Friday, February 13, 2009
depression fights the darkness
The world crumbles as i walk in the darkness. The world as I see. Coverd in a blaket of darkness. Yet the blanket keeps it from the flames of the fire and the cold of the night away.
I cant be who im.
I cant be who im not.
The pain runs deeper than the mask portrays.
Every step I take is one more mistake.
The blood from the knife.
The knife to cut the things that crawl under my skin.
The shaterd peaces of me cut my feet as I run from everything that I'm.
The moon will go its way.
The sun will rise.
Forever blinded.
The bright light casts a darkshadow.
The darkness that kills me on the inside.
The darkness that makes me holow as a shell.
A mask.
I tear myself apart.
Fighting what im.
Living what im not.
Saving the world.
Holding people together.
and yet killing people.
Hold my hand keep me here.
Tell me im not alone.
Catch me when i fall.
For every one falls.
Some people just decide to jump to see who will catch them.
This mood will pass as do my personalitys.
Who im.
The bigest question I ask myself.
The only question I cant asnwer.
I cant be who im.
I cant be who im not.
The pain runs deeper than the mask portrays.
Every step I take is one more mistake.
The blood from the knife.
The knife to cut the things that crawl under my skin.
The shaterd peaces of me cut my feet as I run from everything that I'm.
The moon will go its way.
The sun will rise.
Forever blinded.
The bright light casts a darkshadow.
The darkness that kills me on the inside.
The darkness that makes me holow as a shell.
A mask.
I tear myself apart.
Fighting what im.
Living what im not.
Saving the world.
Holding people together.
and yet killing people.
Hold my hand keep me here.
Tell me im not alone.
Catch me when i fall.
For every one falls.
Some people just decide to jump to see who will catch them.
This mood will pass as do my personalitys.
Who im.
The bigest question I ask myself.
The only question I cant asnwer.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
In the shattered night I sit.
I sit here not alone.
I sit here with her.
Watching the world go as we wait.
Siting here looking at the clouds pass over the moon.
Siting here because we cant do anything to help the world.
We try as we might.
We try to fight what we are inside.
We sit here because the world thinks we are not right for their sight.
We are selfless.
We hurt our self to save our Friends.
We never ask for anything in return.
Just that we may live to see one more sunrise.
we sit togeher in peace.
I sit here not alone.
I sit here with her.
Watching the world go as we wait.
Siting here looking at the clouds pass over the moon.
Siting here because we cant do anything to help the world.
We try as we might.
We try to fight what we are inside.
We sit here because the world thinks we are not right for their sight.
We are selfless.
We hurt our self to save our Friends.
We never ask for anything in return.
Just that we may live to see one more sunrise.
we sit togeher in peace.
I fade away
In my skin the fealing unbearable.
Burning from both ends.
These wounds will never heal.
The scars will never dissapear.
The constant reminder of who I was.
The reminder of Who Im not.
The battle in my head.
The spaced thoughts.
The splits in my personality.
The pain is nothing.
The days are long.
The nights are longer.
Awake though the night.
Thinking Of who I used to be.
Thinking of the person I killed.
Thinking of the world.
Searching for everything.
Finding nothing.
Just the blank wall.
Burning from both ends.
These wounds will never heal.
The scars will never dissapear.
The constant reminder of who I was.
The reminder of Who Im not.
The battle in my head.
The spaced thoughts.
The splits in my personality.
The pain is nothing.
The days are long.
The nights are longer.
Awake though the night.
Thinking Of who I used to be.
Thinking of the person I killed.
Thinking of the world.
Searching for everything.
Finding nothing.
Just the blank wall.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
yea
I know That I dont walk twards the light.
I dwell in the darkness.
Im not though the night.
I will be ok.
Just hold my hand and keep me safe.
Keep me safe from myself.
I dwell in the darkness.
Im not though the night.
I will be ok.
Just hold my hand and keep me safe.
Keep me safe from myself.
never
The mountains may be tall.
The trails may be rough.
The plains may be long.
The desert may be hot.
The moon maby be bright.
The ocean maby be vast.
Yet all the things never come close to you.
The trails may be rough.
The plains may be long.
The desert may be hot.
The moon maby be bright.
The ocean maby be vast.
Yet all the things never come close to you.
Monday, February 9, 2009
alone
I dance in the rain because i can.
I walk in the dark because I like to.
I watch over those who sleep because I can.
I keep you safe at night because I'm the only one willing.
I tear myself apart.
I hold onto all that I can.
I hold onto the world as I watch myself burn.
I burn myself so no one will burn themselves.
I find myself a troubled person.
I find myself as the Guardian.
I wish I could see what every one else sees.
I
Just I
wait.
Its never just me anymore.
I don't walk alone.
I walk in the dark because I like to.
I watch over those who sleep because I can.
I keep you safe at night because I'm the only one willing.
I tear myself apart.
I hold onto all that I can.
I hold onto the world as I watch myself burn.
I burn myself so no one will burn themselves.
I find myself a troubled person.
I find myself as the Guardian.
I wish I could see what every one else sees.
I
Just I
wait.
Its never just me anymore.
I don't walk alone.
the moon
this morning was kindda nice......
I found light in darkness.
the moon was shining though the coulds
a grey light
yet the moon was not to bright.
the moon coverd in shadows of the clouds.
yet it still shines past the darkness.
making it possible to find my way in the darkness.
I found light in darkness.
the moon was shining though the coulds
a grey light
yet the moon was not to bright.
the moon coverd in shadows of the clouds.
yet it still shines past the darkness.
making it possible to find my way in the darkness.
Friday, February 6, 2009
night
ok today started off pritty bad...but it turned out to be a good day.
This is how I thinka bout life. It may be bad now but it could get better instantly..or it may take some time. But it always gets better. You just need to change the way you look at things. And some times let people into your life. And if you lucky some one will let you in their life. Thatys when you relize some things you just cant leave behind with out hurting some one. Thats when you relize things change. Thats why I keep my mind open to all possibilitys. Thats why im who im not.peace out.
night
This is how I thinka bout life. It may be bad now but it could get better instantly..or it may take some time. But it always gets better. You just need to change the way you look at things. And some times let people into your life. And if you lucky some one will let you in their life. Thatys when you relize some things you just cant leave behind with out hurting some one. Thats when you relize things change. Thats why I keep my mind open to all possibilitys. Thats why im who im not.peace out.
night
gone
Just be there for me. When Im gone just be there but dont get to close. Just try to keep me here and when im gone just be you.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
somtimes
somtimes i have good days some times i have band days some times i have worse days and sometimes i just need to be alone. Sometimes i just need to be told im alright. Sometimes i just need a break. Sometimes i just need scilence. Somtimes I wish i could hear myself think. Somtimes I wish i did have to fight myself to stay here. Somtimes i just have bad days. Today is one of them.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
shatterd glass
They lock us up and they hold us down because we think freely. They hate us because they cannot control us. they hate us because all we want is to be free. They hate us because we are the shattered glass that they created from their society. They hate use because no matter how hard they try to touch us they always get cut. We are the free people.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
me......
In the middle of the night I awake to a voice thats not mine. A voices thats close to me but far from my body. The empty space haunting her. The emptyness when I go away. When I go to kill myself. When I fight the evil that is me. Me a funny thought.....
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